The Boy He Couldn't Have
by LIFE the RANGER
Summary: In theory, Gilan thought going to Celtica with two apprentices would be easy. In reality, it's proving to be more difficult than he imagined. It started okay, but then he begins to develop feelings for a certain apprentice Ranger. Trouble is, Will's just the boy he couldn't have. Added to the fact that Will's so dense, it makes for an interesting mission. Rated T for boy/boy.
1. Chapter 1-Too Dense For His Own Good

I've decided, graciously, to make a multi-chapter Will/Gilan story, starting in Celtica and extending beyond. You all better thank me for this. But I find it hard to quit a fandom I love. And I really do love the Ranger's Apprentice fandom.

…

"See how my grip is relaxed, and then tightens at the last minute?" Gilan asked Horace. The apprentice warrior nodded, frowning in concentration. He, like Gilan, was aware of another set of eyes on them. But he, unlike Gilan, wasn't trying to show off for that pair of eyes. Will was leaned against the rough bark of a tree, and wrapped in his cloak as he was, he appeared to vanish from thin air. His being there served as a double purpose. He was watching the proceedings of the battle training, and keeping a sharp eye and ear out for anything or anyone that might try to distract them. Gilan leaned closer to Horace now. "Is he watching?" he asked anxiously. The apprentice warrior shook his head in wonderment. Rangers were known throughout the kingdom as people to keep a cool head. Gilan certainly didn't seem that way today.

"He's watching us," Horace confirmed. "And the trees to our right, our left, around us, and occasionally behind us." Gilan frowned. He was glad Will was taking his training to heart, but with everyone in Celtica practically disappearing off the face of the earth, he wasn't as worried about attackers as he could be. But both had been trained by Halt, a legendary Ranger, and he'd drilled into them to never let their guard down. Even now, Will was ghosting through the shadows to a vantage point that offered a better view. He wished he could climb the trees, but they did little in the means of good hiding spots. He glared at them.

"Why don't you have low branches?" he accused. The trees, of course, offered no comments. He shook his head and ghosted off again, getting lost before either Horace or Gilan could say anything.

"He's good," Horace said breathlessly. For someone who didn't know the finer points of unseen movement, he was ready to agree that Will was perhaps the best. But his claim would be false. Because the best unseen mover was currently doing sword drills with him. And looking a little mopey to boot. Gilan sheathed his sword, more than a little flustered. What it took to capture that boy's attention these days!

"Perhaps if I was a girl…" he muttered to himself. Horace's eyebrows shot up, but he resumed his look of wide-eyed innocence before Gilan could see. It hadn't been the first time Gilan had uttered that phrase, and the battleschool apprentice was sure it wouldn't be the last. "Don't look like that," Gilan huffed. "I know you've heard me."

"You can't go around wishing you were something you're not," Horace replied slowly. It wasn't that he was slow on the uptake, it was just the way he always spoke. In that slow, calculating way he'd become familiar with when he training began. "After all, Will wouldn't want someone who's unsure about themselves." Gilan turned a murderous eye to the battleschool apprentice, but over the weeks he'd become accustom to it. They'd start a task, Will would wander off, and then they'd end up on that topic. Always that topic. Horace was wondering how much of the older Ranger's mind the apprentice Ranger was taking up these days.

"I'm going to scout around," Gilan said moodily, picking up his bow and moving silently off. He disappeared before he'd gone more than five meters. Horace sat by the fireplace, resting comfortably against a log. He closed his eyes let what meek sunlight filtered through the cloud covering to bathe him.

"Looks peaceful." He started when he heard Will speak. He started again when he opened his eyes and Will practically loomed over him, a very big feat for the little apprentice ranger. He'd thrown the cowl of his cloak back, and his messy hair stuck out at irregular intervals. Horace chuckled and made room for the apprentice Ranger, who sat beside him gratefully. "I saw Gilan slinking away, so I decided to come back," he added.

"Yeah, that was partially your fault to begin with," Horace said. Will turned to look at him quizzically. "Gil's been so mopey since we've come to Celtica." Will nodded slowly. He'd noticed that part. "And it's all your fault." At that, he let out a short bark of laughter. There was no way that he'd caused Gil's obvious moping.

"Yeah right," he snorted in disbelief. "Gil's just got a lot on his mind, that's all. It has nothing to do with me." Horace, with the reflexes he'd gained over the months as a battleschool apprentice, reached over and rapped Will none to gently on the head. The apprentice Ranger glared at him, rubbing the now sore spot. "What was that for?" he asked crossly.

"That was for being so dense," Horace said simply. He was content with his lot in life, but that didn't mean he'd let his friends be depressed. He would just as eagerly knock some sense into his friends as well as his enemies. "You really can't see it, can you?" he asked.

"See what?!" Will exploded. "What's there to see, other than this barren countryside and a few things that call themselves trees? There's nothing, Horace!" The apprentice warrior waited until Will finished his rant. Now that some of the fight had left him, Horace spoke calmly again.

"I'm not talking about outside the camp, Will," he said gently. "I'm talking about inside the camp. You need to learn to read people better." Will shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He wasn't good with people. He always felt a little awkward and out of place around others, even friends like Gilan and Horace. It was part due to being a Ranger, and part due to the fact Will was just clueless on how to read people. "Gilan's been trying to show off," Horace pointed out.

"Why?" Will asked. "Who's there to show off to?" Another rap on the head, this time a little harder, and in a different spot. Will glared at Horace. He was really beginning to hate this talk. "I think I'll go see what Gilan's up to," he growled, stalking off. His bow was already slung over his shoulder, as was his quiver. He stalked off, following the path he'd seen Gilan take. Before too long, he found the older Ranger, leaning against a tree with his eyes closed. "Hey Gil," he called softly so he wouldn't startle him. Gilan's eyes flew open and he broke into a big grin.

"Hello Will," he said delightedly. "What have you been up to?" Will rubbed his head thoughtfully.

"Oh, just talking with Horace," he said casually. "About training!" he added quickly when Gilan opened his mouth to speak. "Just comparing notes on how it is to work with two different Craftmasters. I'm not spilling secrets," he added helpfully. "Just about day to day life, and stuff he already knows."

"I see," the older Ranger said, frowning slightly. He had to admit, he was slightly jealous of the friendship Will and Horace had. _It probably helped that the boys were the same age_, he added ruefully. He didn't have many years on the boys, but it was enough. _Maybe if I was a little younger… And a girl…_

"You okay Gil?" Will asked, derailing the older Ranger's train of thought. "You've been so distracted since we've left Redmont." Gilan cursed under his breath. Had he been that transparent? Will laid a gently hand on his shoulder. "If you need to talk…" he began.

"I'm fine!" Gilan replied quickly, perhaps a little too quickly. He pried Will's hand from his shoulder and ran lightly back to the campsite. Will followed at a safe distance, feeling more than a little confused. He'd only been trying to help. But Gilan acted almost fearful of him. When he emerged into the campsite, Gilan was gone again. He looked at Horace, but the apprentice warrior merely shrugged. He sensed Gilan wanted some privacy.

And that he did. Gilan ghosted along, cursing every time Will's smiling face flashed in his mind. Why was he gay? Why did he have to like Halt's new apprentice? It probably had to do with the fat Will was so likeable. He was a young, fresh face at the Ranger Corps, and everyone had been eager to meet him. Since Gilan had been Halt's previous apprentice, he felt a special connection with the boy. Maybe he was letting his imagination run away from him. Will obviously liked Alyss. He'd seen that plainly. So, that question remained. Why, out of all the people in the vast kingdom of Araleun, did he have to like his former master's new apprentice? He could have his pick. But now, he had to like Will. The boy he couldn't have.

…

"Alright, you may have a point about something," Will said to Horace. The apprentice warrior looked up but said nothing. He was going to let Will get out whatever was in his system. After all, he was a simple person. Ranger's tended to have a lot more on their minds than simple swordplay. "I'm worried about Gil," he added. "It's not like him to just run off. I don't think he would've gone far. After all, we're in a strange land, and we're two apprentices. He wouldn't leave us to our own devices for too long. But still. The simple matter is he ran off."

"I know that," Horace said, flushing. Will seemed to think he was some sort of idiot. But the anger died as soon as it had flared. Will was simply worried about his friend. He hadn't meant anything by it. "He's been distracted lately," he added meaningfully.

"With what?" Will asked. "I know this mission is, in a way, big and important, but he's not known for a wandering mind." Horace tisked. Sometimes, he really thought Will was a little too dense for his own good.

…

Alright, so this is the start of this story. I really hope these chapters get a little bigger as I continue.


	2. Chapter 2-Far From Fine

Alright, I'm trying, I really am. I have other stories up at the moment in a different fandom (thank you, loyal and somewhat scary PJO fans). But, at request via PM, I will try to get the new chapter up.

…

Gilan was taking first watch that night, which might've been a blessing in disguise. He didn't have to witness the friendship blossoming between Will and Horace. Which, to a small degree, infuriated him. After all, it was he who sought Will's company for this mission. Horace had just happened to come along out of request from Halt. At the start, it had seemed like a good idea. But it became all too evident that Horace and Will were closer than anyone could've imagined.

So, while he kept an eye to the outside of the camp, he kept one ear on the inside, listening intently to what Will and Horace were saying. After awhile, however, they must have sensed someone was listening, because their voices dropped down to the barest whispers. Gilan could no longer pick out individual words. It all seemed like one big jumble. He gritted his teeth in frustration and turned his focus outward, no longer caring what the two apprentices were saying.

"Is he quite done?" Will whispered to Horace. The muscular youth glanced over his shoulder where he knew the older Ranger was stationed. He could just make out a large, black splotch in the scenery. That had to be Gilan. That, or it was the world's quietest bear. He turned back to the apprentice Ranger, who was shifting in his seat. "It's not like Gil to keep close scrutiny on us," he continued. "After all, his attention needs to be focused outside the camp, not in it."

"Opposite for you," Horace muttered under his breath. At his friend's confused look, he sighed. Sometimes, being the middle man for the two Rangers was exhausting work. "You need to pay better attention to how Gilan is feeling," Horace exclaimed. "He's been acting like someone stuck a thorn in his side all day, and there's no way he can get it out." Will looked at his friend irritably.

"Thank you for once again pointing out the obvious," he snapped softly. Despite the fact they were beginning an argument, both apprentices made sure to keep their voices low. They didn't need

Gilan's attention back on them. Will was all too aware that, every now and then, the older Ranger would swing his gaze back into the camp and study them for some minutes. It was rather like living in a box. No way to escape, and always on surveillance. "I know that. So, how do we get it out?"

"You need to do that," Horace said. "He's fine with me, sure, but it's you he wants." Will tilted his head to the side thoughtfully, turning his gaze to the older Ranger. Gilan was focused outward now, studying the surrounded countryside. But what Horace said grated at him. What did he mean exactly, that Will was who Gilan wanted? Surely the older Ranger wouldn't want a mere boy for company. "Oh Will," Horace said with a shake of his head. "You really don't get it, do you?" Now, the apprentice Ranger swung his gaze to the muscular youth.

"What don't I get?" he asked. Horace shook his head again, tisking.

"Nothing at all Will," he replied. "Nothing at all. We should probably get some sleep. You're set to relieve Gilan in a couple hours." At the mention of sleep, Will had to suppress the urge to yawn. Sleep sounded like a beautiful thing right now. He rolled himself into his cloak, mumbled a good night to Horace, and was soon sleeping soundly away.

…

Breakfast was a quiet affair. Horace roused Will as the first light began to peek over the horizon. Will had the fun task of waking Gilan. But the older Ranger roused much more easily than his mentor, without the usual grumbling and eye rolling that followed. They packed up what meager things they'd spread out, strapped them to the saddles, and sat around the fireplace, eating cold rations. Will finished the last of his and set his plate aside, leaning back against the log he shared with Horace comfortably. Gilan looked like he was sucking on a sour fruit, but he didn't say anything, which worried Will some.

"Gilan?" he asked. The older Ranger's gaze snapped up. _That gaze was almost as unnerving as Halt's sometimes_, Will thought. "Are you alright?" he asked. Horace rose suddenly, startling both Rangers.

"I'm going to go scout around," he said. Gilan gave him a baleful look, but he ignored it, marching off. When he was a few meters from the campsite, he dove behind a tree and watched the two Rangers, full-fledged and apprentice, stare at each other for a few minutes, neither saying anything. "Come on you idiot," Horace whispered in Will's general direction. "Talk to him. Or better yet, get him talking. Don't just sit there acting like you're in trouble."

In truth, Will thought he _was_ in trouble. Now that Horace was gone, Gilan's cool gaze travelled over him. He squirmed in his seat, uncomfortable with all the attention. Gilan finally looked away, trying to mask the hurt he was feeling. First, Will asked if he was alright. Now, he wouldn't even look at him. Will sensed the shifting mood, but he wasn't sure what do about it. He'd always allowed others to take the lead when it came to comforting people. No amount of training could prepare him for a moment like this.

"Gilan?" he tried again. The older Ranger gave no sign that he'd heard him. Behind Gilan, Blaze and Tug studied their masters curiously. Blaze went over and butted Gilan's shoulder, looking at Will as she did it. Will smiled a little at that. Even the horses wanted them to talk. "Gilan, I'm sorry if I've done something wrong," Will ventured. Gilan fondled Blaze's ears for moment before turning to study the young apprentice. "But are you alright? You've been acting odd since we left Redmont."

"I'm fine," Gilan said shortly. He wasn't in the mood to talk. Especially if Will was only going to ask him if he was alright. Couldn't the apprentice Ranger see he wasn't alright? Couldn't he tell he was hurting? Will, for his part, did sense it. He did see Gilan was far from alright. No amount of apologizing could make up for the fact, however, and he wasn't sure what will.

"No you're not," he said with more confidence than he felt. "You're far from fine, Gilan. I want to help. What can I do to help you?" Gilan closed his eyes briefly. It wasn't that he wanted someone to admit he was far from fine, but he was grateful Will had taken notice.

"Thank you for the concern Will," he said after a few moments of silence. "But really, I'm okay. I'm just anxious to find out what happened to all the Celts." That wasn't a total lie. That had been gnawing on him since they found the abandoned town and mines. Will nodded. That was a problem he understood.

"Yes, I'm rather curious myself," he agreed. "I wish I knew what Morgarath is up to. Then we'd know why he'd need the Celts." Gilan nodded along, only half-listening. Horace was returning to the camp. Though instead of sitting next to Will, he plopped down next to Gilan. The younger Ranger looked a little hurt by that, but Horace shook his head. He'd explain himself later.

"Nothing to report," he said, turning to Gilan. "Except a few trees and rocks here and there." Gilan sighed. All this waiting around was finally starting to get to him. He hated not knowing something. Will, he knew, felt the same way. Ranger's strived to know all they could. This lurching around in the dark wasn't doing them any favors. Only Horace seemed somewhat content with the situation. After all, he was a simple knight. He'd let the Rangers think. He was here to bash someone's head in if they needed it. And that included his two companions. "What all happened here?" Gilan shrugged.

"Just expressing how glad we'll be when we finally figure out where all the Celts have gone," he replied. Horace looked at Will, who gave a little shrug of his shoulders. He'd tried to get Gilan to talk, but it wasn't that easy. "Oh, I suppose you sense it too," Gilan said, throwing up his hands. "Will was just asking if I was alright, that's all."

"You're not alright," Horace pointed out, much to Wills chagrin. Will turned a withering look to him. He shrugged. His friend wouldn't hurt him. Besides, he needed Horace to play middle man. Gilan also seemed to find his comment less than desirable, but he didn't say anything. He assumed a thoughtful expression.

"I suppose you're right," he agreed at last. "I'm far from alright, but it has nothing to do with either of you." Horace and Will exchanged a look. "Will, why don't you mount Tug and move a few meters ahead of us. Keep watch." Will nodded and swung onto Tug, moving through the tree line. Horace moved to follow him, but a hand on his elbow stopped him. He looked back and found himself facing a very anxious Gilan. "Has Will…mentioned me?" he asked.

"No," Horace said, with just a hint of apology in his voice. "Other than last night. We were discussing your odd behavior, but that's about it." Gilan released Horace's elbow, waving him on. Horace hesitated, wondering if he could do something to help. Then he shrugged. Gilan would work it out himself. Rangers were good at solving their own problems, he knew. He swung astride Kicker and followed after Will. Gilan studied the campsite with a small frown.

"Why does it have to be him?" he asked for perhaps the thousandth time. "Out of everybody in the whole kingdom of Araleun, why does it have to be Will?" Araleun was a vast kingdom, with plenty of people to pick for potential partners. So why did it have to be young Will? Blaze buttered her head into his shoulder again.

_I don't know_, the horse seemed to say. _But you better figure it out_.

"You're right, of course," Gilan said, stroking her soft muzzle. "I'm sure I'll figure it out. Come on girl. We can't leave them alone for long." He swung up into the saddle, and Blaze shook her mane and whinnied.

_Of course not. You'll get jealous._

And Gilan had nothing to say to that.

…

Woo, slightly longer. How about that? A new chapter! Already this is going better than the other one.


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